With Baba Ji – my journey continues…

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You can wake up in the morning, everything will occur as normal but something is missing, something just doesn’t feel right. That is how I feel everyday since my Spiritual Master left His body three years ago.

His kindness, His humility and His loving personality won many hearts and it definitely won mine. I spend time thinking about Baba ji, my Spiritual Master very often in the day. Whether it is a walk down the corridor, I think of Him and my eyes well up with tears. I am in the car and I look at the clear blue sky and a flash of His image appears in front of, obviously from my own mind, but yet a sign to say, nothing truly dies. I am sitting in my temple, and a thought that Baba ji gave is heard and my heart skips a beat, as if not knowing what to do with the thought that He is known in the past tense now.

He was someone where my spirituality began, where my spirituality continues and where my spirituality will one day end. He is my past, my present and my future. I haven’t loved anyone as much as I have loved Him and I know so many, that feel the same way with me.

The great thing about Baba ji was that He somehow was able to reflect however you saw Him. If you saw Him as a cool person, He was just a cool person. If you saw Him as a person you admire for His sincerity, that is what He reflected. For me, I was fortunate, very lucky by fate or my own faith that I was able to see Him as my Satguru, my Spiritual Master of Truth. For me, He was a God and much more. Maybe this is why there is a lot of pain in the physical loss as right now, I am in growing pains, I am trying to realize the subtle form of His that I know He had planted into me when I was initiated with His wisdom.

I have often said that I reached a peak of one mountain when He was alive and when He died, He took me from that peak and placed me at the bottom of the largest mountain one can ever perceive. For some, they may find that Rahul isn’t as spiritual as He used to be, he was calmer before, he didn’t get so angry but actually I have started climbing this mountain, which I literally have no map to guide me with except my own self. All I know and what I totally have faith and trust in is that I have to find the compass of the inner guru within me – sooner, rather than later.

I am now content in that I cannot change anyone, inspire anyone, or even truly advise them on their spiritual journey except for what I know and like I said right now, I don’t know much as I am climbing this mountain, of which I have climbed only a few steps up. So everyone literally has to bear with me here.

What I have learned is that these three years, which was literally about abseiling down the mountain of which, I had reached my peak. I had to take the valuable lessons and be thankful for they have taught me so much. Now the Master is going to advise me from within but the foundation of all that will be advised from now is literally from what I learned from my Spiritual Master before His passing.

All I now know and what I knew before was that it was all up to me. I had to have the faith and I had to be in charge of my growth. Nobody could take me there. I recall a conversation that I had with Baba ji when I was around 19 years old. We were walking at the Center for Oneness, West London and for some strange reason, Baba ji stopped walking and stepped inside as we were in mid-conversation. It was only me and Him. I poured my heart to Him and said “Baba ji, I am struggling. I am doing sumiran (remembrance) but I am not connecting. I feel my faith is weak.” Baba ji looked at me, smiled and in a quizzing manner. “Rahul ji, I don’t understand how your faith is weak when it is so strong?” I just stared into His eyes for a few seconds, my eyes moist, lost in His humility, His love and His mercy I bowed and touched His feet for around 10 seconds, to which when I was getting up, He was holding my shoulders and He gave me the biggest hug. As we pulled away from the hug, we both gave the biggest smiles to each other and we both bowed as I stepped away so another devotee could talk to Him.

This conversation changed the whole direction of my spiritual journey. I started questioning my whole belief system a couple of years later in order to get what I perceived as ‘weak’ faith into something so strong that it is unbreakable. However, a lesson I have learned recently is that I was in charge of my faith. I decide whether it is strong or weak and that whatever faith you have for yourself, is how much faith you truly have with the Master. If you feel you are incapable then the Master can do very little to change that because you feel incapable. However, you can feel incapable but you know your Master is with you, within you so now you are absolutely capable and this brings forth a very strong faith.

I have a lot to thank Baba ji for and He knows how much He means to me and nothing can change that. No philosophy, no teaching can change that. Like I said earlier, it ends with Him. We are meant to have full faith in a living Master, to which I absolutely agree with. Living is subject to one’s definition. Does someone have to be physically alive to be living? Or can someone be alive through consciousness itself -in a more subtle form? One of the rules of nature is that energy never dies but is transferred. All that has happened to Satguru Baba Hardev Singh ji on this day, three years ago was that the energy that was physical or gross matter became subtle matter.

This post has come from a lot of reflection with some meditation too. I don’t know if what I believe in right now will give me liberation but all I do know is that I know that is my destination. Thank you Baba ji. Love You and miss You! Your child forever.

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Be True to Yourself

The sign of a person drenched in ego is very simple. I have contemplated on this human behavior for a long time. I came across it while I was at university and a situation occurred in my life, which I was really agonized and upset about. Also, a similar situation has occurred in recent times too.

The human behavior that I am talking about is when people lecture about forgiveness, yet have no remorse for their actions. Instead, they teach you why you should forgive and yet it is their deeds that have upset you. You tend to look at the person and wonder if they are being for real. Like, did they not understand what they did?

I have this habit of being absolutely silent with someone when I am not happy with them. This is for a few reasons. I know myself and I know that my tongue can be razor sharp, so instead of saying anything hurtful, it is better for me to be silent. If someone tends to act holy than thou and I know their reality then I am going to be silent because such false appearances can anger me and again, my razor tongue will give out venomous words. I forgive straight away, but I am aware always and my awareness takes me to silence.

I understand forgiveness and when someone is asking for it. I understand an apology even if the word ‘sorry’ isn’t expressed or of those lines. I completely understand if someone says other words but I get their vibe, I understand their energy and I accept the apology and move forward with the relation.

What I don’t like is when someone tells me I am not adhering to a certain philosophy or I am not practicing my Master’s teachings, or I am apparently not walking the walk. Soon as I hear things, I am automatically shutting down any desire to forgive or to move on. It may be that the perception of me is not ‘ideal’ but at least I am true to myself. I am true to my feelings. I don’t give a false act.

I believe in oneness of all but that doesn’t mean I have to get along with everyone. There are differences and that is beautiful in itself. I am happy where I am and others can be happy where they are. In fact, this is peaceful co-existence.

Like I always say, I am not a perfect person and enlightened beings are not perfect either.  History has shown us that but what is perfect is if we embrace imperfections.

The whole point of my post today is to say that I am not someone that is false, I am practicing my Master’s teachings wholeheartedly and I do stumble, no matter what is being perceived. I know what is happening internally within me and only me and Master knows what that is.

Mentors

Having mentors is incredibly important and having had my fair share of mentors, I feel my whole life has been incredibly enriched by them.

It is not always about the lesson that you have learned but more about how you grow and evolve as a person from the lesson. If you have evolved then you know the lesson has benefitted you in many ways and you can continue to grow and enhance your life.

We all want a life that is holistically enriching and we can do this with the help of getting different mentors. You can have one for finance, for health, for spirituality etc. Making sure that you can make your life the best that you can is what will always make you wake up in the morning full of gratitude.

Choosing your mentors has to be a thought out decision because you need to make sure that your mentor will always be there for you to help you grow and see unique perspectives. When someone has your best interests first, you know that they are worth keeping in your life.

I have benefitted a lot from my mentors and some are not alive today, but they have helped me grow so immensely that I cannot think of my life without them. I have learned valuable lessons and this has allowed me to have a broad-mind, filled with compassion and understanding.

Mentors show you the path and walk along with you. This is why mentors have a great positive effect. They are not like role models, where images of their greatness can be shattered. However, a mentor is someone where even their flaws have something of great value about them.

I hope you have a mentor and let me know your experiences with mentors?

Meditation changed my life

rahul meditatingMeditation changed my life, in fact it became a way of life for me. It isn’t the typical, sit on the floor, cross-legged, eyes closed with hands forming a mudra type of thing. Although, if anyone watched me meditate they would see it but meditation is beyond what is seen and the only way anyone can understand meditation and what it does needs to practice it themselves.

Meditation for me is about the awareness of Formless Consciousness at all time, as I commit to any act and associating all thoughts and feelings to this Vast Void. What triggered this? Wrong question! Who triggered this? That is the question. This was simply triggered by a moment of surrendering to my spiritual Guru. Now, despite all the scientific research that has gone into meditation – it can only study the brain and the way it functions during meditation. What science cannot dissect or analyse is consciousness as they do not know why consciousness exists and how it was created. This is where spirituality is a science of knowing the inner self – your consciousness or as the Sanskrit term calls it the ‘atman’.

Meditation made me a calmer person and I used to get very agitated, irritated, annoyed at any little issue. With meditation slowly all the things that would prove to be an annoyance slowly faded away. It wasn’t as if it disappeared and I didn’t know how. I observed my thoughts slowly transform. I watched my consciousness change the way it started to see things – it moved from reactionary to responsive. It thought of both sides and then picked no sides. It responded to the moment and that was the only thing that it would have to ‘defend’ if it came to that.

Meditation made me experience love for the first time and it was a love that was unconditional. Yes, it was a broken heart that began meditation to mend the pieces back together but my heart has remained broken ever since. It hasn’t pieced itself back together, it hasn’t even made the attempt. Now, I love like there is only love. Even in hate, I see love. I do not find hate to be an absolute opposite. Hate is simply a premature state of love. I disagree even with the words ‘like’ or ‘fancy’ someone because it means love really. We don’t like to be honest, or frank about it but love is simply love. It’s opposite called hate is just a premature state and it will eventually evolve into love. Hate is another gateway into love. Maybe it is this new formulation of love that has helped me to accept people as they are even if they annoy the hell out of me. I accept it and move on.

Meditation has made me accept me for who I am. I mentioned earlier that I started meditation due to heartbreak but that was just a reason for me to get to know who I am. I would go further from the previous paragraph that nobody can break your heart and when you realise this then your meditation goes deeper. When you realise that it was your thoughts and feelings that made you feel the way you do then you can transform pain to something of the beyond. Once I did that I was able to see past the silliness of who I thought I was and started being more. When you are more centred in Being then life is simpler and even fascinating. I realised that this personality will always have flaws but what I am and who I am is beyond all these labels, definitions and ideas that people possess.

Meditation has made me accept my own mortality. Accepting the fact that you are going to die is no easy task because who wants to think about an apparent ‘morbid’ topic? For me, death is one of my favourite topics because it no longer has a place in fear but has a place of celebration and love. Meditation allows you to explore what it would be like when you die and the answer is always well it wouldn’t matter because I would be dead anyway. Death is only for the mind and dying before you die is giving your atman the place of your mind as the driving living force of your being. When you are able to accept this then you become somewhat immortal as you know that death can only be for the temporary but how can death happen to something that has no beginning or end? If you have been there before time became a factor in creation then surely you will outlast it. I used to do an inquiry into when I was born. So before I was a foetus, was I a sperm cell or an egg, or was I cells that made those, was I from the air that my mother or father breathed first. When was the beginning? I kept exploring and eventually I found that I couldn’t locate it. Surely, I would have to be there before creation to know that has been created. You may need to read this a few times to truly grasp what I am saying.

Meditation made me more open minded towards other cultures, other communities, religion, and spiritual affiliations, people who are hard hit by society, their gender or sexuality. I used to judge a lot and have very strong opinions about things and they had to be either this way or that way. Now, I only see oneness. I am able to still have opinions but my compassion and understanding is for everyone. Meditation allows you to see beyond the surface so it is not that easy to formulate a definitive opinion, instead it is an opinion that is fluid and adaptable. When you see the other as a reflection of you then it becomes easier to be a little kind and look past the diversity in the other and see it as a unifying force.

Meditation has made me see the laughter in a lot of things. In fact, it has made me less serious and this is because meditation has helped me be a very happy person with a carefree attitude too. I am serious when it comes to the actual meditation but this seriousness is not one that sucks the energy out of you. It is a seriousness that has a taste of devotion towards completing an act because you love it. A sense of humour becomes part of life as you realise that everything that we hold to be important is not really that important and jokes also challenge our perceptions. Living life with a lot of laughter and smiles is the way the meditator experiences life. Enlightenment is a serious game but that is what it is a game and at the end, it is best to laugh about the result, whether it is in your favour or not. Remember, your atman has nothing to do with the results, it just lives because that is what is important – it rests and loves in Being.

Meditation gives you a resounding sense of bliss and bliss has no opposite. Bliss is what occurs when you go beyond the senses and meditation assures that. Bliss is a feeling or an experience that goes beyond thought or emotion. Imagine that! When this first hit me, I was expecting a come down because I felt like I was high on drugs. There was no come down and there never has been. Bliss is very important to live life to the fullest. This is why we do risky things in life. With risks, we want to access something that is beyond the status quo of what should be achieved. Bliss is a blessing and this is all due to the grace of a living Guru that it is maintained. You will get this sense of bliss anywhere and it can be invited without an invitation. You can be at work and it hits you and you are in this state of bliss. You could have tears of joy or be smiling constantly – this is the beauty of bliss and meditation stabilises it.

Meditation has made me observe my ego and my ego hates it. The ego tries to go crazy whenever someone praises a blog post, praises a speech I do or a poem I recite or write. It loves to fill me in with a sense of pride and I watch all this as an observer. An Observer that then recognises that it has also become the observed. This is the state of witnessing and this runs side by side with bliss. When you begin to observe the ego, the less power it gets. The ego tries to catch you with thoughts that are totally unrelated to the present moment and you are able to shrug it away by telling it that it has no place with you. The ego is eventually put to the side to die slowly whilst you live in the witnessing state of bliss consciousness.

As you can see meditation has had a positive impact on my life and I would like that other people experience this. It helps you to see reality for what it is. You are able to be more present, more mindful and this is what enhances life towards new dimensions. Meditation is easily enhanced with a presence of a Guru, who can show you Reality without a precondition. If you have a strong thirst to know life, to understand what it is all about then with the guidance of the Guru – the meditation enhances. This has been the secret for what has happened with me in meditation. Due to this realisation, I sit with the company of the wise, I serve humanity because everyone is my own and I am in remembrance of this Formless Consciousness that is within me, every living being and beyond existence too.

What has meditation done for you?
What would you like meditation to do for you?
When would you like to meditate?
Are you finding it difficult to meditate?

It is better to speak up than keep it in. Sometimes the answer is in the asking.

His love and blessings
Rahul

Let’s be Practical!

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Once the Guru says something, do I take it with a pinch of salt and continue with my own way? Or do I take a moment to think and act accordingly to as the Guru prescribes. We read in our scriptures, in stories like the Puranas of devotees who acted simply at the hint of the Guru. We hear of the Guru celebrating them with great happiness but with a hint of sadness too as there may not be a devotee even similar.

The path that the Guru prescribes is never easy because it is allowing someone else to have the power over your thoughts and actions. Now for a lot of people this is difficult because the illusion is that they are in power. People even struggle with the fact that there can be a Guru. It isn’t a difficult concept either. Just like we have teachers in education, we have Gurus for spirituality. They have something above the typical teachers we see. A Guru is able to impart knowledge aswell as show their students how to live and implement it.

The Guru can be seen as an object of worship and devotion. Every morning that I wake up, I may not be anywhere near my Guru but I place my head at His feet. I have His blessings and whenever I need uplifting, I can close my eyes and place my head at His feet and feel His hand placed on my head and feeling the energy of the Divine power up the crown chakra. The Guru is the one that leads you to embrace the wordless, formless, beyond ideas and concepts, that which no thought can reach, no feeling or emotion can describe it or even feel it, it is beyond the comprehension of the mind, ungraspable by our intellect. This Truth that the Guru leads you to is everything you ever need. It is Fullness, it is Isness.

I can praise my Guru, have His blessings but I need to implement His teachings. Am I discriminating others on their language, age, nationality, sexuality, caste, religion, diet, dress and even their Gurus? Am I hurting other people consciously or unconsciously? Am I leading people to the Truth or am I taking them astray? Am I forgiving those who wrong me and do I ask for forgiveness from those that I wrong? Do I listen to others without judgement? Do I create conclusions of others before even knowing them? Do I feel greedy at any time, or selfish or even lustful? Do I pass all praise and criticism to the Formless? Until, I am able to say that I practice everything my Guru teaches, only then can I say He has blessed me. The problem isn’t that the blessings are not there, they are always here and now, but am I utilising them? Am I putting them to good use?

I do not want to be one of those that just shout empty slogans, make applauding speeches but little inner implementation in daily life, sing songs but feel miserable inside, recite and write poetry without an iota of experience manifesting in my daily routine and interactions with people.

It is time for some serious action and after listening to my Guru’s discourse this Saturday and again on Sunday, I feel I have a lot to do. If anything, I want to atleast be a reason for His smile. That whenever He hears my name, He smiles because I am committed to His cause and teachings. Commitment isn’t just a contract, it is actually living accordingly to the contract. And if I do not live according to the contract that I signed meaning the Divine Wisdom that my Guru revealed to me, then I am breaking the clauses in my contract. And let me add this, the punishment is simple – you do not live in bliss. What is the point of life without bliss?

Time for impactful action, less time for mindless reaction.

His love and blessings,
Rahul

A New Dimension

10808bf51ff30249a8b83f13f7095d2fThe moment I am in His presence, a dance occurs without steps, music occurs without sound, poetry occurs without words and my head bows to His feet – where all blessings are received. Bowing the head to the feet of the Spiritual Master – a sacred ritual that heightens a seeker’s spiritual experience. Why? The head which is the house of two things – one the ego/mind or the third eye. Once my head touches His lotus feet then I am submitting my ego/mind for the Divine Vision – the activation of the Third Eye.

The past two months have been unexplainable. All I know is that something within me has changed and access to a Higher Dimension has been opened with the kind Grace of the Beloved. The Beloved has shown me a love that I have never experienced in my life.

At this moment, my Beloved is on His way to India and I miss the fact that He is not here in Europe or North America. I spent my whole day fighting back tears because I have never felt separation like this before. I can only think of the time when my ex-girlfriend left me a couple of years back but ten times worse. But this is different. Let me explain…

This heartbreak has shattered my heart into billions of pieces but yet my heart has never felt as fulfilled as ever. My Master, my Beloved who I used to experience only as the Form – His human form as an object of worship, He has opened a new dimension where He Himself has become Formless – the very essence that He points to all the time.

In recognition of the Formless much is discovered if one is willing to explore into the Nature of this Reality. Let me put it frankly – enlightenment is not an option. You were born enlightened and you must die enlightened. Enlightenment is what God is. Realisation of the Formless is enlightenment. So when your Guru becomes Formless for you then you have entered an interesting phase because this love has no opposite, it has no end nor a beginning, it has never been born and will never die then you are entering a new dimension. You have attained something and now you must come to terms with it.

I love my Guru like anything. I am very attached to the Form more than I should be. However, He has changed this and now He is experienced in the Formless, He is everywhere and His beautiful Form is always seen and felt. This dimension is vast and I know the next steps because the Guidance of the Guru continues. Remain open so He can answer and change your life. If you stop at one place, or one dimension then you have limited the Guru but how can you limit the Limitless? It is impossible. You have to go beyond all dimensions to then enter the state where it is dimensionless. Only then is the Formless perceived in full glory! What a glimpse! What a vision! I bow at my Master’s feet – this is where all treasures are!

I am in constant meditation, His remembrance is happening automatically and my mind and body are coming to terms with it. Oh Formless Beloved, only Your kind grace and blessings can calm this tempest!

I am a traveller in the Formless,
I am travelling alone,
The Beloved and Formless are within all,
Rahul makes this declaration my friends!

His love and blessings,
Rahul

Radical Change through Compassion

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We need radical change and it is needed NOW.

I have spoken to many people, introspected and dived deep into my own thoughts and the processes behind it and the whole machinery outright rejects the verdict that the nation has given in giving the Conservatives an overall majority vote.

Every morning, I wake up with a sense of deep sadness that millions are in or about to face suffering. I feel as if I am young Siddharta, who later became the Buddha, in the sense of feeling the deepest core of your being watching the suffering, feeling that suffering and then taken to plight to discover compassion.

I have some very close friends and we were discussing the difference between empathy and compassion. In a very quick analysis, one would assume they are about the same, however the deeper you enter compassion, the bigger the difference is, even if it is a subtle one. Empathy is when you can understand the pain the other person feels. You do not experience it but you have the intention to help. The main aspects of empathy are understanding and intention. Compassion is when you feel the pain the other person feels. You experience it deeply and your intention turns into action to find the remedy. The main aspects of compassion are deep feeling and action. Now, I may never understand what it is like to go to a food bank, however I feel the pain if someone had to go. To look at themselves in the mirror or at their loved ones without any sense of hope but a deep acceptance to carry on, I understand the pain, I feel the pain, I can actually experience the pain and damn, I need to do something about this.

When I say doing something about it, it isn’t in the pseudo sense of ‘I am going to achieve success, get a job, get a wife, buy a house, have kids’ type of delusional fantasy. I will be protesting against the system that has created these walls, these parameters that mean success. Why should success be individual? Why does it have to always depend on me or the idea of ‘me’? What about working as a collective, so the collective aspire together and achieve success they can share.

It is hilarious when I think of the cycle of life and I wonder if I will be the same. When we are given values from our parents, we are told to share and do things together because together we are happy as our own happiness radiates to everyone. Later on, as we get older, the story changes and it is all about my grades, my university has to be better than my siblings and competition breeds the individual and sharing becomes a distant dream. Being in the community will be a waste of time. Even concentrating on the true sense of the individual like meditation will be seen as time that could be used for studying or profit-making. Then we have kids and we instil the same values as our parents did to us. Finally, we come face to face with the hypocrisy.

Damn, the flashbacks begin. What happened to us? When did we become so distant from others and our own values? When do we turn back on the idealistic world we have created around wealth and come back to a reality of sharing with others, having that sense of community and living moment to moment? When do we transform into that child again? People tell me that if we all became children again there would be chaos. My reply is looking at the poverty in the world, the all-encompassing suffering, the attack on the vulnerable and those who need our love the most, can you tell me this isn’t chaos? The only reason it exists is because we think we are ‘mature adults’. The fact is we remained adolescents, growing with the enticing nature of competition and individuality, only that when we grow older, we have a few lines and wrinkles to state we are adults.

Today, the politics that I believe we should aim for is a holistic one. Not one just based on economics but one based on happiness. Without happiness, even wealth becomes a poison. We have to understand that we have to close the gap between the rich and poor, we have to get rid of food banks and source our food locally, we have to stop the privatisation of our health service and make it accessible and free to all, we have to embrace the elements we have to create renewable energy. The time to make the change is now. Life will always be awesome, whatever the situation but that doesn’t mean we can’t evolve the awesomeness to new heights. We can do this, if we are all together.

Join me on the 20th June, outside the Bank of England and let’s begin the revolution of happiness!

His love and blessings,
Rahul