The one thing about being a writer is that even if you have moved on from something, you will be dragged back into that headspace. You always have to give an experience to the reader or the listener and to do this you have to give them the emotions that you had during the time.
As I look to start writing my poetry book based on my memories, experiences with Baba ji, my Beloved Spiritual Master, I know I have to go back in time and feel the exact pain that I felt then and still deal with the feelings I have now. This is the way I write my poetry and therefore, it is not necessarily that what I write is about how I feel right now but it can be about a feeling I had 5 years ago or 5 days ago.
This is going to be tough and it will get tougher while I write what I feel and how I felt, how emotional each experience, memory holds and it is in this space that I have to gather spiritual stability, to maintain that witness within me and let everything flow naturally.
We all face challenges and this book is one of them. I decided today that this book will be the last book of the trilogy, of which two books have been released already. It marks the end of the Master-Disciple relationship of Rahul and Hardev. Baba ji will always be my Beloved and it is Him that I seek all wisdom from. I want to see Him in everything and find that all ways are His beautiful ways.
Each day is tough in dealing with this loss and it never gets easy. What helps is the love and care that you get at home. I let out a lot of what I feel through writing and being in the present moment but what is experienced will always be empty and silent eventually. This emptiness will have His fullness and this silence will have His harmony. At the moment, I may be getting signs of it but He never lets any of His disciples down. All I have to do is be in synchronicity with Him.
My tears have been flowing as I remember how much He gave to me and what He gave can never be repaid for several more lifetimes but I have to repay it in this lifetime. This means I have to work several times harder to reach the goal that He gave us – which was to be enlightened, divine beings.
I will start writing tonight and all I wish for is that you all give me your good wishes and blessings.
Satguru’s love and blessings
Some of us learn to meditate, we have done it for many years but there always comes a point when we feel that something is blocking any further progress. The thing with meditation, apart from its scientific and medicinal value, it is a spiritual practice that is about reaching a state beyond the body and mind.
I have always used the image of my Guru – Nirankari Baba Hardev Singh ji when I begin the remembrance of the Formless Truth. Remembrance is the next stage after meditation. Meditation clears the mind, remembrance goes beyond the mind. Meditation takes you to the boundless, formless state whilst remembrance allows you to become the boundless, formless state. Remembrance is simply knowing who you are and being who you are. When we seek to know our true nature that is meditation, when we seek and become that becomes remembrance.
The power of remembrance is moving beyond words and entering silence. When you know you are focussing on the Formless, you recognise you are in This and you are blessed. This is the blissful state that is only felt with remembrance. When you become that very thing that is always stable and still – when you remember that this is your nature then stability and stillness is your state whilst in movement.
Meditation comes in waves and you reach peaks and valleys. However, with remembrance you are able to be in this one state of rising above, you are the witness and observer. You are neither moved by pleasure or pain, happiness or sadness, differences of forms, by the nature of thought, by action or inaction.
What I am saying here is not about comparing. If you think this is comparing then it is ego. Many compare the difference and then drop one of them. If you want to enter the state of remembrance, meditation surely does help and can help you get to focus quicker. Use meditation to help you if remembrance is proving to be difficult. Whilst meditation needs to move to remembrance eventually as this is the next stage.
I still sit with my back straight, tilt my head back a little and allow my eyes to focus on the third eye area, sit cross-legged with my palm facing upwards whilst my forearm rests on my knees and this is something I learned during my meditation days. I carry this forward because it reminds me of the sacred space I am about to enter completely. Then I begin to enter the state of remembrance and lose all essence of myself and enter this formless state and be in complete being.
Remembrance is being both in movement – sitting, sleeping, eating, waking, walking, talking etc and at the same state be in the same state of the formless – still, free, boundless, love, compassion, blissful etc. This is the tricky aspect of remembrance. You have to live normally and do all the normal things but be still and blissful like a Sage, a Buddha or your Guru. This is the essence of spirituality that not many can grasp or understand. They cannot balance this because they have not become the formless state. They fear it because somewhere they have fear for something. If you want to enter the Formless and be the Formless then you have to be as mighty as a lion, fearless and determined to be completely free.
In this state of balanced remembrance, you will be able to fully function in your daily activities and be in bliss at the same time. This has to be the goal for anyone seeking enlightenment. There is no two ways about it. This whole process is made easier with the grace of a Master, a Buddha, a Sage. I was lucky enough to have a Master, who gave His kind grace and showed me how to meditate and be in remembrance of His true nature. The Spiritual Master is a mirror and reflects Your true nature and this is the beauty. Unless, we clear our vision so we can see this true reality, we will be stuck in just praising the Master but doing nothing about it. We have to be as the Master wants us to be. The disciple has to end the relationship between the Master and Disciple because their relationship has to go beyond all titles and labels into a state of unconditional love. This has to be the aspiration of the disciple.
The Grace of the Master with practice on remembrance makes the whole process towards enlightenment easier and we need to learn to be this Formless at all times. Settling for anything less isn’t good enough. Go beyond everything so you can be Everything.
Be in remembrance – when you know you are focussing on the Formless, you can observe and witness the Formless and converse with it. Then you recognise you are in this Formless and are protected by this Formless. Finally you are blessed because you are one with this Formless – the bliss and ecstasy you are witnessing and have become is the biggest blessing. And in this process, you may see your Master and seeing the Beloved Master is just another sign that the blessing has begun. And it surely has for me!
Try out being in remembrance and feel and become the presence of That which you seek.
Thank you for reading. Please like, share and comment.
The moment I am in His presence, a dance occurs without steps, music occurs without sound, poetry occurs without words and my head bows to His feet – where all blessings are received. Bowing the head to the feet of the Spiritual Master – a sacred ritual that heightens a seeker’s spiritual experience. Why? The head which is the house of two things – one the ego/mind or the third eye. Once my head touches His lotus feet then I am submitting my ego/mind for the Divine Vision – the activation of the Third Eye.
The past two months have been unexplainable. All I know is that something within me has changed and access to a Higher Dimension has been opened with the kind Grace of the Beloved. The Beloved has shown me a love that I have never experienced in my life.
At this moment, my Beloved is on His way to India and I miss the fact that He is not here in Europe or North America. I spent my whole day fighting back tears because I have never felt separation like this before. I can only think of the time when my ex-girlfriend left me a couple of years back but ten times worse. But this is different. Let me explain…
This heartbreak has shattered my heart into billions of pieces but yet my heart has never felt as fulfilled as ever. My Master, my Beloved who I used to experience only as the Form – His human form as an object of worship, He has opened a new dimension where He Himself has become Formless – the very essence that He points to all the time.
In recognition of the Formless much is discovered if one is willing to explore into the Nature of this Reality. Let me put it frankly – enlightenment is not an option. You were born enlightened and you must die enlightened. Enlightenment is what God is. Realisation of the Formless is enlightenment. So when your Guru becomes Formless for you then you have entered an interesting phase because this love has no opposite, it has no end nor a beginning, it has never been born and will never die then you are entering a new dimension. You have attained something and now you must come to terms with it.
I love my Guru like anything. I am very attached to the Form more than I should be. However, He has changed this and now He is experienced in the Formless, He is everywhere and His beautiful Form is always seen and felt. This dimension is vast and I know the next steps because the Guidance of the Guru continues. Remain open so He can answer and change your life. If you stop at one place, or one dimension then you have limited the Guru but how can you limit the Limitless? It is impossible. You have to go beyond all dimensions to then enter the state where it is dimensionless. Only then is the Formless perceived in full glory! What a glimpse! What a vision! I bow at my Master’s feet – this is where all treasures are!
I am in constant meditation, His remembrance is happening automatically and my mind and body are coming to terms with it. Oh Formless Beloved, only Your kind grace and blessings can calm this tempest!
I am a traveller in the Formless,
I am travelling alone,
The Beloved and Formless are within all,
Rahul makes this declaration my friends!
His love and blessings,
I stared at this Path with His wondrous Self,
I looked into His eyes that smiled freely,
He anticipated my doubts and delusions,
All He did was walk ahead of me as if in ignorance.
I watched a doubt arise and delusion in despair,
He would turn around every time with a smile,
To check if I was still focussed,
Or was I about to lose to the wavering mind?
He stopped by a tree that was ready to blossom,
He touched the centre of my forehead,
A gust of wind appeared out of nowhere,
Stood still by the tree as if seeking permission.
It felt that now that time had stopped,
Was I about to receive the Teaching I longed for?
His compassion and mercy pierced my heart,
I had no desire but to learn of the Artist of this Art!
He didn’t utter a word nor give a sound,
Nor a sign or a hint to offer as a guide.
He closed His eyes and I followed Him,
Little did I know what was in store for me!
I got sucked into a swirling vortex
My senses defeated so who am I?
Everything came to a screeching halt,
Colours of mist appeared never seen before.
My Guru walked ahead of me on the Path,
Not because He is first and I am second.
He made sure nothing hurt me on the Path,
His feet bruised and my feet untouched.
How these visions appeared without intention,
As if the Truth felt obliged to reveal,
My Guru surrounded me yet nowhere to be seen,
What do I do amongst indescribable colours?
A blink of an eye and I was back on the Path,
The Guru with His eyes open featured beaming smile,
The gust of wind stood still like a guard,
A clap and the blossom rained from above.
The path filled with flowers and petals,
This was the moment the heavens celebrated,
Perceptions heightened accessing all dimensions,
I had finally realised who I am.
This only happens with the Guru’s grace,
The Truth comes to you not the other way round.
The Truth in fact is always here,
Do we realise its access is eternal-bound?
Without the Guru the path is dull and dark,
Even realisation will bring you pain and hurt,
Everything is smooth once the task is complete,
Until then the Guru is everything you do not seek.
He will shatter every belief you possess,
Question every ritual you do in spiritual pretence,
Create situations to test your emotions,
Losing your balance is it He that you will hold?
The Guru is the glistening Reality,
That is Self-revealing and Self-created,
It neither needs ‘me’ nor ‘you’
This is the objectivity the Guru requires.
Bliss descends upon you from the Beyond,
This is blessing from the Blissful Beloved,
Standing in front of me with no form to see,
Just a Formless Self an endless Presence.
A vast, changeless, void that looks like nothingness or emptiness. An atom is 99.9% pure energy and what we see is really just 0.01% of the atom. The Formless Reality is everywhere and in everything. It is a state beyond nothingness. Nothingness cannot be nothing when you can observe nothingness. If an observer is present then that means there is an element of awareness within that nothingness. This element is what is formless – this is Nirankar.
David Bohm towards the end of his life had likened humanity to be the “mirror created by the universe to reflect upon itself.” What does this mean? Upon reflection, we can discover that if humanity is a mirror created by the universe to reflect upon itself then we know this isn’t far from the Upanishadic thought that Brahman created the world in order to discover Himself.
We live in an era where people place scientific thought to be based as truth rather than their own experience and documented spiritual realisations. This is where I feel people falter. Spirituality is considered just as ludicrous as dogmatic religion. Spirituality is about your own experience and the eventual realisation of why you are here. It is to discover the obvious fact which is that we are the 99.9% of the atom and the 0.01% is merely our physical forms that we see with our limited perceptions. How can we human beings with our limited minds be able to understand a complex universe that can do whatever it wants at any given time? We are at the will of the Universe or the 99.9% and we think the 0.01% with it’s limited apparatus can understand and measure the vastness of the Formless? This is madness.
The vastness of the Formless is beyond any words expressed here. It contains so much love that intensifies within every moment. Love is beyond every dimension and it is within every dimension. The purpose of the whole universe, the whole reason behind it realising itself is out of pure love.
Time fails in front of IT as this is Infinite. It is timeless. It goes beyond time. What is time? The future and past are both in the present and therefore there is nothing as past. It is one time at every given time. A moment is an eternity. How can Formless Energy be given the parameters of time? In fact, how can the Formless be measured? It cannot be measured. The only apparatus you have is your self and when you realise your self then you are one with the Formless. Then you feel the Formless Nirankar. Nirankar means formless. You and the Formless are unified and bind together. You both expand as one. When the walls are broken down, the bridge towards wisdom and clarity appears. This is when our heart opens up to devotion to the Formless. Our dancing becomes the dance. Our singing becomes the song. Our writing becomes the poem. Such is the experience when the Formless enters our consciousness. In fact, it does not enter your consciousness, it IS your consciousness.
The endeavour of all spiritual discovery is to live in the Light of the Formless, to live in the energy of the Formless. To accept the grace of the Formless and enjoy the blessing that showers upon the soul. The challenge in life is not about remembering the Formless, the real challenge is living as the Formless. People are doing this and I bow to them. They are blessed and they keep blessing me. I am humbled by the One who imparted this Divine Wisdom to me as it led to my realisation.
This realisation is the best thing. Nirankar, the Formless is the love of my life. I cannot trade this wisdom for anything as nothing can ever be valued against This. The realisation has allowed me to travel to dimensions untouched by the limited human mind, it has allowed me to travel through time to timelessness, it has allowed me to perceive matter as it is. It has allowed me to expand into this Vast Void and then dissolve into it so that only the Formless remains.
Nirankar is not nothing, it is everything!