As much as I write,
I can never touch the glory of the Creator,
I cannot write even a single letter.
The power lies in the word,
Once the word is understood,
It is heard in all directions,
It becomes the Friend of your heart.
I have tried to write about This One,
Who has shown me just a glimpse of Him,
And I am failing to write a single atom to Him,
His Vastness has no bounds and is infinite.
When He is fully realised,
This pen will not be able to lifted,
The beauty of the Formless is indescribable,
Silence fails to even comprehend Him.
My Formless, I surrender to You,
Let the Pen of Realisation re-write my mind,
Let the Pen of Realisation re-write my heart,
Let the Pen of Realisation re-write my soul,
Wherever and however I am approached,
May it only be You – Formless One,
That is experienced by all.
Surrendering I am singing Your praises,
Surrendering I am writing Your praises,
Surrendering I am hearing Your praises,
Surrendering I am walking Your praises,
Surrendering I am forever alive,
Whoever surrenders is never born nor dies.
Words – spoken or written will never do justice to the most beautiful person I had ever known – Baba ji.
More than six months since He left His body, I feel the sadness, loss, pain increasing everyday.
I have never felt a loss like this due to the multiple relationships He fulfilled for me. I lost my best friend, my father, my uncle, my Satguru all in one go. I don’t know what to grieve for the most or where to even begin.
His sweet nature, His soft spoken voice, His language of respect, His expressions of compassion, His being that brought people of every background together was a reason for my existence and still is.
After the conclusion of the 69th Nirankari Sant Samagam in Delhi, India, I am left with deep regret and I feel disappointed in myself.
Baba ji never considered His own wellbeing, somehow Nature made sure that He was fine. Baba ji never considered His own family, somehow they managed to work around Him, all He cared about was taking the Truth to the Masses and allow people to attain liberation through the medium of God-Knowledge. His famous saying is self-realisation through God-realisation. Once we realised God, we know who we are. This is all that He lived for and He spent 36 years, sleeping for just 2-3 hours a day, travelling constantly just to awaken people like me.
Which leaves me to explain why I feel deep regret. I was never able to achieve my own expectations of being liberated whilst living and that while He was alive. I took His mortal existence to be Immortal and Eternal and this led me to take my spiritual life to be secondary and something that could wait. There was no sense of urgency for me. I did try to make it my primary reason for existence but I know that at times, instead of surrendering to what was happening, I kept worrying, I kept getting disturbed and ultimately it led to me letting Him down.
People tell me that I am ahead of them spiritually and it is a nice thing to say and even hear and I respect this opinion. However, I had my own expectations that were in line with Baba ji. He wanted my thirst for God, for enlightenment to be my everything. I had even glimpses of moments when my intensity for Truth was so much, my personal life took care of itself. My career controlled itself, it evolved by itself. I saw all this and yet I didn’t pursue this path of intense spiritual yearning. I let those glimpses remain glimpses, instead of signs that showed me what is about to arrive in my life.
His death has made me re-evaluate everything about life. Since He has died, I have got married, moved career paths but the one thing I didn’t evaluate as much as I thought I would have done on the 13th May, was my own spiritual journey. Despite knowing that Baba ji lost His life in the matter of a moment, I was still taking it easy. I was still putting spirituality in my life as a secondary thing. It remained my part-time lifestyle for when it suited me.
After the 21st November, I realised one thing. I can go in any moment, Death is always waiting.
The other thing I realised, I let Baba ji down. If only I could have been the disciple He was looking for, maybe I could have kept Him alive, given Him a reason to continue instead of bringing such a change in tragic events. I have always believed an enlightened being can decide their death and for someone like Baba ji, it goes without question. I feel personally responsible for not giving Him an alternative choice and I am not saying that every devotee of Baba ji should feel the way I feel, the question should definitely occur in us about what are we going to do following from this tragedy.
I see that I have no choice now, actually I didn’t have a choice before. I wanted a Satguru, I found Him and I knew His expectations. I know what He wanted. I don’t have a choice. Everything in my life has to let my spiritual journey take it’s place as my primary source of joy and everyday living. The thing is I have surrendered and I can’t think about my needs or wants. I have full faith that I will commit to my worldly responsibilities with just as much passion but it will never be at the detriment to my spirituality.
To complete the spiritual journey, I will have to put it first and put it into practice. I will have to focus more on being aware of the Formless One. This will have to be done whilst I complete the responsibilities I have. This is about sacrifice. I may have to put things on hold, not give as much attention as I can to certain aspects of life but it is all worth it. It is only when one has achieved the purpose of life can they truly be of value to others.
What Baba ji did for me, I can never pay Him back in hundreds of lifetimes, it will never be enough and this regret overwhelms me and I want to pay back this debt if I can.
I’m sorry Baba ji, I deeply regret not being fully enlightened in Your lifetime. You were the best thing and continue to be the best thing about my life. If I didn’t have these beautiful memories of You, my life would not be worth living. Thank You for giving us a new Satguru and I pray that I can in Her presence reach my potential – a brahm gyani – an enlightened being.
We all face a certain situation where we feel that we have been treated unfairly or we know of others who have been treated unfairly. We find corrupted leaders who are able to place corruption charges of those that are ‘below’ them or accuse them of crimes, which they themselves commit. Such hypocrisy is there and it is up to us to do something about it.
When you expect someone that you respect breaks your trust, could be a person in your own family, could be a friend or a role model and they turn their back on you then what do you do? If you are treated disrespectfully, is it right to fight back? Is it right to be angry? Is it right to be violent in such situations? What should one in such a situation?
The easiest thing always looks like the most difficult thing to do. The easiest is to forgive the fool. Now you may be thinking how is that possible, especially when you have been wronged but that is the best form of retaliation. On top of that, you keep silent with them and you do whatever is necessary to bring justice. If a person is famous for something, show what they do as an opposite for what they are famous for. Another one is to forgive them openly, and if they don’t respond to that then they surely will look foolish to the intelligent amongst the crowd.
You see a lion only needs to roar once to indicate that the presence is truly there. You don’t have to be a dog that barks at anything and everything – that is a quality for something else. A lion decides when it is best to prey for righteous action and that which does less harm.
I have a friend, a close friend who is in such a situation and cannot speak out. This post is rather vague in the context but what I am trying to say here is that take whatever comes your way but never lose your righteous spirit, your spirit to do good and inspire good. The corrupt never win because truth always prevails. Truth always wins and will be victorious. All it requires is humility, love and compassion. If these are the driving forces for action then you will do the most damage to what is bad and unruly. However, this is not damage in a destructive and evil way but damage in the sense that the world cannot cope with evil for too long. We see that the basic humanity within us all starts speaking and, therefore all good action grows and has the snowball effect.
If you feel that life is drowning all hope, if you feel good isn’t winning for you, if you feel that bad people look ‘holier-than-thou’ but are in fact manipulative and conniving, then do not lose your values in exchange for their vices. Another person’s vice cannot be defeated by your own vices. It is by your virtuous nature, rooted from your humanity that finds ways to let the Truth highlight what is false.
Do not give up. The sun always shines whether it is day and night. In the day, the one Sun lights up the sky but it is the millions of Sun’s that light up the night sky. Truth works faster in darkness because then it is a group working together – and that is why they are called stars!
The question that always enters the mind is whether knowledge is more important than the truth we find within. We all have intuition and what is the difference between our intuition and the blessed ones of the past. Is knowledge more important than our intuition? Is our own created knowledge less valid than others? Who says Krishna is more valid than you? Who says Moses is more credible than you? Who says that Buddha is more valid than you? Who says that Christ is more valid than you? Who says Mohammed is more credible than you? Who says the Sikh Gurus are more valid than you? Who says any living Master or Spiritual Teacher today is more authentic than you? I am certainly against anybody that claims that you cannot be as valid as them, as credible as them and as more authentic than them. By quoting someone else’s knowledge does not mean that you are any more special or that it is even your truth. In fact, you are a bigger idiot if you are quoting stupid knowledge if you have not found your own truth. You need to find your own truth, create your own knowledge and then you can if you wish, use different scriptures as a device to make other people understand. In my opinion, anyone with their own truth has no need to use any scriptures because only people without a truth of their own use other people’s words and that half-heartedly. Whenever I use scriptures, it is only used to make other people of different background understand and even then I am probably using 1-3% of that scripture, the rest of it is probably pure nonsense to me.
If anyone says that you cannot have your own truth is the person that certainly hasn’t found his or her own. Gain your own truth, your own knowledge because you are full of infinite possibilities. You are more credible than any book because you are alive. You are your own Divine Being. All you need to do is trust your self, look within you, go beyond the structures set in the mind and find the Eternal Truth that is bursting to reveal itself.
Love and stay blessed
Rahul N Singh
Question: Where can I find the truth to all the mysteries of the universe?
Answer: The question that is asked is where? How can I explain to you that pilgrimages are nothing but good exercise and nothing more. The truth is not only in the different forms of pilgrimages or in the temples of God and the no-God. The truth is within you and the search is not external but internal. So many people go on big journeys to pay their respects to an idol when they forget to see the idol within them. Anything that has been created on Earth has come from the earthly elements and so are the gurus, prophets and masters. The difference between us and the masters is a simple notion that they have searched within and have found everything within. They have given their devices and should be kept as a device and not a TRUTH. Whatever TRUTH you think exists is not your truth but someone else’s. It is not authentic to you. Truth has to be your possession, it has to be from your centre, it has to be from the inner consciousness of your soul.
The truth is very simple. Whenever you put words to it then there is always something missing. I have always felt the truth that you can possess can only be felt, it can only be experienced and that words are just devices to stir that truth within you.
I have always gone against God but not because I deny his existence. He definitely exists but not the way theology has expressed him. The Truth or God is within us all. God is the creator and to accept he is the creator then it must be accepted that he is creation itself. There is no difference between God and Creation. Creation is different ‘parts’ or ‘pieces’ of this one Spirit. The Truth is manifested in all. The God that we talk about needs to be experienced right now. There is no future for God because He is timeless. His truth is not for tomorrow but is for today. I am against the theists and the atheists too because there is a middle ground and the middle ground is where the truth is. You have to look in between the two extremes. There is a space in between the two extremes and that is where this Formless Consciousness resides.
The Universe itself will always be a mystery until you know the Truth. The mystery is only a mystery when truth is absent. Once you know the Truth then what can remain a mystery? You know that everything relies on each other and the mystery is not really all that big. It sounds big because we do not know the truth. The Truth is incomprehensible in words but it can be felt. The mysteries can be answered but not by words but by experiencing it. You need to allow your self to find the mysteries within. Your life itself is mysterious. The more you search for a meaning the more you know that the meaning is realising. All you need to do is continue realising what is within. Once the truth is established then you see the beauty of the mysteries. When you know that you your self are the mysteries then you will understand you need them to sustain. You are the creation and that is the truth. It has been said before and is being said today. By me telling you the truth will not mean anything until you find it within you. Sit silently and ask your self ‘Who am I?’ and the answers will become infinite.
Love and respect,
Rahul N Singh